It became real casual talking about T, and since the nature of our relationship is based merely on trust and mutual respect, it became really abstract without the physical contact part in a relationship.
What I am facing now is, security. T is not a fan of the future, all the time. On the other hand, I need assurance of the future, at least a direction where I know I'm heading.
Big Sis mentioned that she's the type going on:
"Take one step at a time. T didn't give promises because things might change in the future."
On the other hand, we used the 2nd chance's as example, and quoted:
"Polar bear went all out, going for a 2nd time to get together with Heart. There's got to be some credit for him, and its so unfair to say that this relationship is not given a direction of going far as to getting to the marital stage."
just little things we share over LINE to spice up our conversations
It's like a dilemma.
On one hand, we don't make promises because we might not be able to take on the variables in our environment. On the other, we all wish to have some sort of assurance, or direction on where we are heading now after.
Side note, T and I are planning to go further. If we have the chance, any at all; our graduation pictures should include both of us.
One in 2016, where I'd probably will be having my clinical practicals in one of the vet universities in T's place; one in 2017, where I'd host T while having T in my graduation pictures.
I wonder how my family would react to as T coming over just to be in my pictures. Will the cat be out of the bag?
Future event is unpredictable and unprecedented. He doesn't make any promises yet due to his insecurity he has. All I can say is to take one step at a time. It's a common scenario for most of us. I do have my insecurity toward my future as well, but what I can only do now is to live life the way I want it to be as long as I am happy the way it is.
ReplyDeleteThat's pretty true. Sometimes I would just wish we can at least see ourselves down the road for, another 5 more years? That's promising enough for me. I'm not the person living with just "NOW". I need "THEN" and what "WILL" happen. It's really just me being trying to have things within my grasp.
Delete"The time is now." ;)
ReplyDeleteLike what I've told Izach, I'm a "then" and "will" person. Now, is somehow a lil mediocre for me. It's really just me.
DeleteHello!!!
ReplyDeleteread this post of yours got me interested to know who T was, LOL (was just kepoh )
Then i saw the vet/med post of yours. OMG YOU WENT THROUGH MED SCHOOLS AND NOW VET? WOAHHHh u're truly one of a kind.
Then I read one of your post and realize u know Japanese well! OMG! as well as german? hahaha It's hard to find language hardcore fans here. I have to admit I get very excited everytime i meet one haha. I'm fluent in a few languages as well!
hope we can be friends = )
Haha T? Well, I gave hints before so its your job to find out who T is!
DeleteAnd yea I dropped med school for vet school. It was a dramatic roller coaster ride, but I'm all settled in now. One of a kind? Blame it on my family background! Growing up has been, well, different.
Japanese was a language I picked up when I aimed at the Jap Government Scholarship, which I didn't manage to get after 2 attempts. Well, if I aimed at vet school instead of med at that time, things might be different, no? I learned German, well really out of curiosity but its so mediocre now I don't feel like continuing hahahaha. I'm taking up Thai now instead, one reason for being able to talk to T in a much more intimate manner, another because I wish to have a higher market value, especially when AEC hits and us vets left hanging high and dry.
I believe we CAN BE friends hahaha, no qualms over knowing more people right?
Oh how I love a bag of surprises :)
ReplyDeleteNot this kind, REALLYYY
Delete